Monday, January 26, 2009

HAPPY CHICKITTY CHINESE NEW YURrrRRR!!



So peep game today is the official day of the Chinese New Year based on the Lunar Calendar. If you have a dumb look on your face, we have this awesome invention called wikipedia, so look it up. NOW - pretty much the chinese and koreans (not like YOU can tell the difference with your 1 korean friend) follow this shit - the japanezos like to do it the normal way with da rest of the world, though seriously with all the time zones and shit, fuck new years...

So 2009 is the year of the OX, or as you more commonly may know as a fuckin



yummy piece of steak...So like what the hell happens on this day?! Absolutely nothing really. Just mad AZNS in chinatown blowing fireworks showing you the kungfu they could never pull off in a street fight and a lion dancers that can actually fuck you up. Oh yea, and you can buy those illegal baby turtles on sale to match your fooey vuitton belt! If youre a kid you get these things:



RED ENVELOPED from ya parents, uncles, family friends and all that shit. When you're 5 yrs old, that 1 dollar coulda bought you crack, but now that youre like 20, you might hustle up a couple G in ya pocket on that butteryass hustlin type steez. So make sure you hang around some rich uncles around this time and you'll be set for the year.

If you're all fucked like my family, you get no loot! One day my parents decided one year, "You guys are too old." Last time I checked, you stopped receiving dough when you got married...WTF! There ain't no ring on my finger???! No wonder my peeps call me Changstein and shit.

Why else do you think I'm printing fuckin neon monster shirts now WTF?!

And you usually eat MAD SHIT with like mad people. My folks like to keep it real
cuz they hate everyone so we cut that 20 person dinner to like, umm....5.

-SO-


But if you do big things like they do in China (minus the dog cat rat shit)
hahaha ya'll muthafuckas never had rat?! RAT SON?! Ya'll never wondered what Splinter
would taste like all chopped up and shit?!

Fuck that!



Well if you ain't stuck on a street corner in China, youre prolly some bougie ass dude, who refuses to squat and shit on the floor, watched the Olympics n Beijing and got a boner from those 12 yr old gymnasts...and of course, wants to experience the finer of Oriental cuisine in the Far East... :)

SO-

-You might get lucky enough to pick your shit fresh from inside the restaurant son!...




"Yo B_Ron you ever seen or had shit like that?!"


FUCK NO! Man as if them kids cutting your heads off in Virginia ain't bad enough!
I like turtles, but not for dinner son! They fuckin gotta grow up and eat pizza son!

GONG HEY FAT CHOY BITCHES! CREEP STREET CHOP SUEY SHADES YOU BETTA BELIEVE IT!

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